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TMHS 316: How To Create Beliefs That Empower You – With Guest David Meltzer
What could you accomplish if you gave 100% of your effort to the things that truly matter? What if you wholeheartedly committed to your goals, and always went the extra mile? Too many of us only work at 99% capacity (or less), and then feel defeated when we can’t produce results.
Today’s guest is a huge proponent and example of how giving 100% can change your life, help you reach your goals, and serve others along the way. David Meltzer is the co-founder and CEO of Sports 1 Marketing, which is arguably the most notable marketing firm in the world. He is a true leader, a successful businessman, and overall inspiring human being.
David has an extraordinary story of rising to the top, failing, and then reengineering his life and redefining success in a deeper, more meaningful way. His story is a powerful testimony of what can happen when you decide to give 100%, sharply define your focus, and consistently practice gratitude.
In this episode you’ll discover:
- The danger in attaching your happiness to outcomes.
- Why asking for advice from people we love can lead to resentment.
- The number one way you can prepare yourself for the things you want in life.
- What it means to elevate your vibration (and how it can help you accomplish more!)
- The importance of surrounding yourself with successful individuals.
- Why no experience is inherently good or bad.
- How radical humility changed David’s life.
- Why a victim mentality can diminish your potential.
- The four guiding principles on which David built his life and business.
- What it means to be a student of your calendar.
- How to attract abundance.
- What it means to go the empty mile.
- The importance of being consistent on a daily basis.
- What it means to pay a dummy tax.
- The number of mentors you should have at all times.
- Why (and how) David started prioritizing his health as his greatest expense.
- The multitude of benefits that come from serving others.
Items mentioned in this episode include:
- Onnit.com/Model _ Get your optimal health & performance supplements at 10% off
- Thrivemarket.com/modelhealth _ 25% off your entire 1storder + free shipping!
- Get Financially Fit & Upgrade Your Identity with Ed Mylett – Episode 282
- Ed Mylett Show – How to Sleep Smarter with Shawn Stevenson
- Innercise by John Assaraf
- Connect with Dave Website/ Podcast/ Facebook/ Instagram
Thank you so much for checking out this episode of The Model Health Show. If you haven’t done so already, please take a minute and leave a quick rating and review of the show on Apple Podcast by clicking on the link below. It will help us to keep delivering life-changing information for you every week!
Shawn Stevenson: Welcome to The Model Health Show. This is fitness and nutrition expert, Shawn Stevenson, and I'm so grateful for you tuning in with me today.
I think that a big part of our success in life, and a big part of our experience of happiness, and health, and well-being, has to do with us really embracing and understanding the role of our story.
I know this might sound a little bit crazy, but our story is incredibly powerful, and we're all on this journey, and in a sense we're kind of like the star in our own movie, but sometimes we pass off that starring role to other people.
We try to pretend like we're just a bystander or an extra in our own movie, but it's really about embracing that hero role in our movie and in our story, and understanding that all the things that we've been through in our life has been leading us to something exceptional. Right?
And your story is in process right now, that's the great part about it. And as soon as you realize that you are the hero in this story, and you take that pen, and you start writing- you might not have been in full control of your story in the beginning, but right now you have the opportunity to finish writing the story, and writing your journey the way that you really want to.
It doesn't matter what you've been through historically, it doesn't matter what circumstances, what bad decisions you have made or may not have made, the time is now to really take control.
And now we have so many incredible examples of folks who've been on just crazy trajectories, and they've been up and down the mountaintop, and they're coming back with great gifts, and sharing their stories.
And many times, as we're going to talk about today, there's something called a dummy tax, where you get to learn from all the mistakes somebody made, and they're going to pay that forward so you're not making those same mistakes.
And my guest today, he's worked with the person who's been framed- there's Jerry Maguire, the movie. Alright. The movie Jerry Maguire, everybody knows about that. "Show me the money. Show me the money."
So this was one of his partners early on that he was working for, and now he has the biggest sports marketing company in the world.
But for him to get from where he's come from to where he is today, it's been nothing short of seemingly miraculous on the surface, but he had a change in his mind, he had a change in his consciousness, in his thinking, and his approach to how he's serving, and bringing more value to the rest of the world.
Alright? So today we're going to talk about value, we're going to talk about transforming health, because this has been a big mission of his as well, because he saw that he was beginning to pour- trying to pour from an empty cup, because he was giving so much of himself away that one day he woke up and realized that he had really lost his health, and he wasn't being the very best version of him in the things that he was doing.
Plus we're going to talk about service, and how that can pour into our own lives, and bring so much benefit to ourselves, but also obviously contributing so much value and transformation to the world around us. Alright?
So it's going to be incredible, alright? But listen, I'm on the road right now in my LA studio, and when I travel I love, love, love to bring along my insurance policies for my health, right?
These very specific things that add so much vitality, and also these are just things that I have on a daily basis that I really see as like a tonic. A tonic is something that builds up in its benefit as you go along.
And so one of those things that I add to my morning coffee, or teas and things of that nature, are my MCT oils. And I specifically love the emulsified MCT oils from Onnit, because it's like a coffee creamer.
First of all, it tastes amazing, but the benefits are out of this world.
Medium-chain triglycerides, or MCTs, they don't function like 'regular' food. When you eat a food, maybe this is a wild caught piece of salmon, or maybe it's a banana; it has to go through a conversion process in the human body to be used as energy.
So that fish currency has to get converted into human currency, if that makes sense, and this conversion process can leave you with a net loss potentially.
It can leave you in a situation where it's taking a lot of energy to try to process this food. Now that's all good, but what's so unique about MCT oils is that they bypass that natural process, and they can essentially go right to the cells directly to be used for fuel, to be used for energy.
So it's like that American Express basically; never leave home without it. Right? It can be converted and used in many different places.
So it's that instant conversion, alright? This is why MCTs are so beneficial. Also, they've been found to have an instant effect- beneficial thermogenic effect on your metabolism.
So helping to support that metabolic rate so you're burning fat at an optimal level. Also, it's been found to be very, very beneficial to support a healthy microbiome, alright?
So some of these compounds that are found in the MCT oil are bad news for pathogenic bacteria, alright? So it could selectively take those guys out and help to support the probiotic friendly flora. Alright?
So just it's good for your gut, it's good for your energy, and it's good for your metabolism. Alright?
MCT oils- the emulsified MCT oils from Onnit, alright? I love the vanilla, I love the cinnamon swirl, and they also have coconut, strawberry, so many great flavors.
Head over, check them out. It's www.Onnit.com/model. That's www.Onnit.com/model and you get 10% off everything. Alright? So definitely check them out, get that MCT oil.
I even travel with it, alright? I throw it in my suitcase, I'll wrap it up, maybe put it in a Ziploc bag, the bottle, if it's opened already. But I've got to bring it along.
It's like one of my- it's in my superhero utility belt, alright? I need that, alright? You've got to be ready. So www.Onnit.com/model for 10% off. Now let's get to the Apple Podcast review of the week.
ITunes Review: Another five-star review titled, 'Look Forward to Listening Every Day,' by Logorn.
"Thank you for the up-to-date nutritional news. This is such an enlightening and motivational podcast. It is important information that our family discusses and learns from. You are a part of our day. We appreciate all that you share. Look forward to each new episode."
Shawn Stevenson: Thank you so much for leaving that review over on Apple Podcasts. I appreciate it so very much, and listen, if you've yet to leave a review, please pop over and do so, alright?
It means a lot to me, and also just to let people know what you think of the show, alright? I'd appreciate that so very much.
Now let's get to our special guest and our topic of the day.
My guest today, I found out first on my friend Ed Mylett's show. So Ed had an epic, epic episode here on The Model Health Show, and I did an interview for Ed's show as well, which is just breaking the records with his exposure, and downloads, and the reach that Ed is making right now.
And so we'll put his episode in the show notes, and also in his show. And so in preparation, and just doing some research on Ed, I was listening to a couple of episodes of his show, and it was great.
But when I heard my guest today on Ed's show, I was just blown away. I was literally like, "Who is this guy? His story is incredible. How in the world does everybody not know about him?"
And he's just been behind the scenes making all of these incredible moves, helping so many people, and the way that he's going about it is no less than just remarkable.
It's absolutely remarkable because there's a lot of heart, and there's a lot of giving behind what he does, and he's also one of the most successful people on the planet.
And so I can't wait to share his insight with you. My guest today is David Meltzer, and he's the former CEO of the legendary Leigh Steinberg Sports & Entertainment, and the co-founder and CEO of Sports 1 Marketing, arguably the most notable sports marketing firm in the world.
He started with nothing and became a millionaire just nine months out of law school, but then he lost it all, and his rise back and beyond where he was before forced him to codify the rules of success.
And to that end, everything that he and his business partner, Hall of Fame quarterback Warren Moon- I got Warren Moon's card. I've got his football card that I got from a pack with the bubblegum in it. I still have it, alright?
Warren Moon is his business partner and friend. Everything that they do has a charitable component, all of their business ventures, and his rules only accelerate their business growth, having that charitable component.
Sports 1 Marketing is currently involved in projects surrounding many of the world's biggest sporting events including the Superbowl, the Pro Football Hall of Fame, the Masters, and countless others.
Definitely check him out, follow David on social media, and you'll see why both Forbes and Entrepreneur named him one of the top keynote speakers on the planet, and Variety Magazine's Sports Humanitarian of the Year.
And I'd like to welcome to The Model Health Show, my man, David Meltzer. What's up, man?
David Meltzer: Thanks, Shawn. Thanks for having me. I'm really excited to be here. Anyone friends with Ed Mylett is a friend of mine.
Shawn Stevenson: Definitely. I love Ed. I love Ed.
David Meltzer: Me too. Talk about positivity.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah, man it's so great to have you on. And I want to start with your superhero origin story. Alright?
Because that's just a nugget what I've shared here, and I usually don't read people's bio like that, but your story is so fascinating and just before the show we were talking about like you've been literally all over the map with where you've come from.
And so let's talk about the early years, alright? Because your kind of childhood background, you definitely didn't think you'd be doing what you're doing today.
David Meltzer: No. I didn't. I actually thought I was going to be a professional football player. I grew up in a highly academic environment with a single mom and six kids, and our way out was education.
But for some reason- I'm going to get choked up when I talk about my mom. But all I wanted to do was be rich, and like not for me, because I grew up happy.
Five boys, one girl, two-bedroom apartment in Akron, Ohio. It may not seem like a bed of happiness, but it was the start of understanding that I lived in a world with more than enough.
And it's very important as we kind of go through this to know that that's the world that I believe in. And even though monetarily most people would look at me like I was living in the Bugani in Africa.
To me it was more than enough, but the only time I wasn't happy was I'd catch my mom crying because the car broke down and she had too much pride to ask for help, and all these energies and things kind of laid into me.
But I just wanted to buy my mom a house and a car, and I thought because I was so fast, from running scared from people, that I would be a professional football player, although all my siblings, they reached academically Harvard, Penn, Columbia.
I was kind of the black sheep of the family because I believed- truly believed in myself, that I was going to tear my way out of this economic downturn by being a great athlete.
Shawn Stevenson: Wow. Wow, I did not know that part. That's incredible, and I could just see just the connection and the drive.
I think that's so important because a lot of people are like, "I want to be rich." But why? Why would the universe endow you with these funds if you don't have a very specific reason?
David Meltzer: Yeah, there has to be a 'why' to everything that you do. And then the 'how' comes.
It's what do you want? Why do you want it? And how are you going to get it? And those are three things I still use today, and I see so many people not even know what they want. They don't even know if they want to be happy.
I tell people all the time you're guaranteed happiness from the time you open your eyes to the time you close them. That's enough. That's enough.
And allow the universe to unravel in front of you. Allow things to happen, and the way you do that is to be of service, and I didn't know that when I was younger.
Shawn Stevenson: And so coming out of law school, you had a pretty meteoric rise.
David Meltzer: Yeah, you know, I learned a lot wanting to be a professional football player and getting my butt kicked. Then wanted to be a doctor, and learning that I'd better be more interested than interesting.
Which really played later in life as I ran Leigh Steinberg. So many people still today are like, "Mr. Meltzer, I want to be a sports agent." And I think back to when I was eighteen years old, and realized I wasn't going to be an NFL player when I got my butt kicked in college.
And my brother at the hospital, I go, "Hey, I hate hospitals." He's like, "You're saying you want to be a doctor and you hate hospitals?"
That one line though, be more interested than interesting, changed my life. And so I graduated law school more interested than interesting.
I had two choices; to be a litigator or to work in technology- in the Internet. This was the early nineties. People didn't really know what the Internet was yet.
So I asked my mom, "What should I do?" And she says, "The Internet is going to be a fad. Be a real lawyer," but I decided not to.
Shawn Stevenson: Oh man, the classic, "The Internet is going to be a fad." I've got a friend-
David Meltzer: So is social media, by the way.
Shawn Stevenson: Right. Right, you're welcome.
David Meltzer: Yeah.
Shawn Stevenson: That's so crazy. I haven't shared this with you before, but- so I'm obsessed with health. I'm obsessed with biology, kinesiology, like these are my geeky passions.
And initially I went to school premed, but I found out that I hated science. I hated it.
David Meltzer: Wow.
Shawn Stevenson: I hated everything about it, but it was the way that I was taught. You know? It was so disconnected from my reality as a human.
And so once there was a connection, like I lost my health, and so my kind of journey back and discovering how much all these things that I was learning in class, in this kind of technical superficial way, related to me.
And so I decided to make this so much more colorful for everybody else, and make that connection happen. You know? And so being interested, you know, and that's what it's really about. It really makes that connection.
David Meltzer: Yeah, it really does. And I think the second lesson too I learned, and I think it's important for everyone out there, is a lot of times we ask advice from people that we love so much. That doesn't mean it's good advice.
And then we end up resenting the people we love the most because we ask them a question that there's no way they would know. Like asking my mom, a second grade teacher, about the Internet. Bad move.
And she was giving me advice on what she felt would be best for me.
Shawn Stevenson: Right, she was looking out for you.
David Meltzer: But if I didn't get involved in the technology side of things, I never would have evolved to what my life was. I never would have had the rise, and I lived nine months of being a millionaire right out of law school.
Shawn Stevenson: That's nuts.
David Meltzer: Yeah, it was nuts.
Shawn Stevenson: So lately I've been really kind of for whatever reason- and it's why I asked you before the show if you met my friend Bedros Keuilian before, which I'm going to definitely link you guys up.
David Meltzer: Please.
Shawn Stevenson: And I talked to him about failure because he's had some really crazy stories of failure. Today, a lot of the great entrepreneurs, and people in the fitness business, they go to him to go to another level because he's so acclimated to success now.
And so I want to ask you, like what happened? So you had this meteoric rise, and you lost everything.
David Meltzer: So simply, I surrounded myself- and this is what you were talking about when you started the show; surrounded myself with the wrong people and the wrong ideas.
I attached my happiness to outcomes again and again. "I'll be happy when I graduate law school." "I'll be happy when I make a million dollars."
What happened was I kept becoming more and more successful. I ran Samsung's first phone- their very first smartphone called the PC Phone. I was a CEO at thirty-two of the very first smartphone ever.
And I built this beautiful home down in San Diego, in Rancho Santa Fe, and I remember I had no 'why.' I sat there empty, and I started this process of self-sabotage by surrounding myself with the wrong people and the wrong ideas, and pretty soon I lost stake in who I was.
And I went back, thanks to my wife, and I realized who I was, and started living my life with those values.
Shawn Stevenson: Wow. So it's not just the people were around, it's the ideas were around.
David Meltzer: That's why you listened to the podcast.
Shawn Stevenson: Right. Right. Can you talk a little bit more about that? I think that's really fascinating.
David Meltzer: Yeah well because there's an energy to every action, thought, and belief. Even your economy. I always say look at your five best friends. Average their salaries out, that's probably what you make.
You'll be amazed. You are the aggregate of what you read, what you listen to, who you hang out with, and when you do that, you start realizing that- and everybody from Tony Robbins, they talk about surrounding yourself with the right people, the right ideas.
And when I started reading Napoleon Hill, and Wayne Dyer, and all of a sudden I started elevating my vibration, and looking at vibration.
I know on the health side, you understand it. It's a critical component, it's a thermostat that Ed and I talked about, that vibration. How you vibrate, you can only be aware of that which vibrates equal to or less than you.
So if you're continuing to expand, and elevating your vibration closer to the truth, you're going to be aware of so much more than everyone else.
Shawn Stevenson: Right. That's something that I've been- I've touched on a couple of times. We've done over 300 shows.
David Meltzer: Wow.
Shawn Stevenson: And I've talked about being able to handle the wattage of this abundance that you want to have. Are you actually capable of handling that good that you actually want to have?
David Meltzer: Yeah.
Shawn Stevenson: Right? And it takes a lot of inner work, it takes a lot of physical work. It's not just a mental or spiritual thing, but physically to be able to handle all that goodness.
I know it sounds crazy, but you could probably speak on that a little bit, too.
David Meltzer: Yeah no doubt, and some people- I worked with a guy named Master and Doctor Shaw. He's probably one of the biggest healers in the world.
Grand Master from China, and he's a medical doctor. He gave me these beads, and I trace calligraphies for energy and enlightenment every day, to carry that energy.
And when people go to his workshops, at the end, the biggest comment I always get is, "Man, I feel terrible. Right? I feel so bad."
Because physically they can't handle- like literally, when you go to Tony Robbins or other workshops, if you ever end it and you just think you're exhausted, but you actually physically ache, and people get sick sometimes, it's because they can't physically handle the elevation that quick.
You know, it's like not jogging and then running a marathon. Your body is going to be really sore. It's not humanly impossible, but you can actually do that emotionally. Energy and motion.
And I see it all the time that people don't- as John Assaraf says, they don't do the appropriate 'innercise.' They do the appropriate exercise, but they're not using the parts of their 'innercise' to make sure they're fit and ready for what they're asking for.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah. So what do you recommend people do to do that 'innercise'?
David Meltzer: Absolutely meditate every day. So one of the things that I teach is the consistency of things. I believe two minutes of meditation every day is worth more than an hour a week.
I can prove it in sports, golf is the easiest way. I'll tell anyone, "Golf thirty minutes a day with the appropriate help. Thirty minutes a day focusing in on a certain area of the game. By the end of the year, you'll be a much better golfer guaranteed, even if you don't play one round of golf."
Whereas if you play six hours of golf every week on a Saturday, which is twice as much time as a half an hour every day, you could be a worse golfer.
Same thing is true about meditation, and that's because there's exponential power in doing something every day. It goes from your cellular to your neuropathways into your unconscious.
Shawn Stevenson: Absolutely, yeah. And so what you're talking about as well- and we've touched on this many times, but this is why I love talking with you, because it brings stuff full circle.
It's like this myelination process, right? So you've got those nerve pathways firing in a certain way, and you're laying down more and more insulation over those pathways so they start firing automatically, versus that when it's randomly happening and you're wondering why things aren't getting better.
David Meltzer: Yeah, you create these systems and wiring that's wired to your success and what you want. And just in the contrary, there's the Zero Effect that you and I had mentioned before.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah.
David Meltzer: And this is where people don't get it. They literally- you could do something- let's say I get you to say thank you thirty straight days.
Day one, it's one. Day two, it's one times two. That's the power of gratitude. Day three, it's one times two times three. Day four, times four. Day five, you forget. That's times zero.
So at the end of the month, if you want to harness the whole power of gratitude, you would be at multiples of thirty-one - the permeation of thirty-one - but let's say you zeroed yourself out three times.
Now in your mind, you're thinking, "I did it all month, twenty-eight days, man. I'm on it. I'm super grateful." But you've zeroed yourself out so you either get no results or incremental results compared to the person who can consistently, which leads to persistence.
Right? When you do something every day, then you don't quit. The enjoyment of the pursuit of that potential, the highest vibration, the truth.
Shawn Stevenson: Right. It becomes a part of who you are.
David Meltzer: Yeah.
Shawn Stevenson: It's difficult- and I know some people, when they don't have this as a part of their life, but there are many people listening who they feel weird, or off, or even terrible if they don't exercise.
David Meltzer: Yeah.
Shawn Stevenson: Because it's so much a part of their psyche.
David Meltzer: That's a great point, and that can happen with good habits or bad habits.
Shawn Stevenson: Right.
David Meltzer: You can feel drained or lost.
Shawn Stevenson: So you just brought up something that I wanted to talk with you about, and you said gratitude. And this can seem kind of airy fairy, this can seem kind of disconnecting.
David Meltzer: I call it woo-woo.
Shawn Stevenson: You know, and so- but I feel that this is the one thing that I do no matter what. Some things might get kind of checked off or cut off depending on the schedule, you know?
For many years, my schedule entailed meditation, exercise, reading, drinking water, all of these things. I do the water no matter what, this inner bath that I've been teaching people about for years - it's in different books now - and I read.
Like those are the first two things that I do. Meditation, it's not like it used to be. I used to meditate for thirty minutes for like two and a half years straight, and then it started to change, especially after having a younger child show up.
And I do more mini meditations, but every day, no matter what, I still have this gratitude practice and it just shifts my energy in a really profound way, and it really gets me focused on why I'm doing what I'm doing.
So can you talk about for you, the utility value of why gratitude works?
David Meltzer: Yeah, the utility value is that it's the easiest way to change your life.
So we both have studied physics - quantum physics, meta physics - and all the different things that I've learned, nothing changes your life more than your perspective, and there's only one factor in perspective, and that's whether you're grateful for it or not.
Because what gratitude does, it makes everything in your past better, everything in your present even better than that, and everything in your future even brighter.
It's an entire perspective changer, and so what we want to do is program ourselves, wire ourselves to be grateful, and the power of it went beyond just saying thank you in the morning when I woke up, and listing out like a little five-year-old what I was grateful for, and thank you when I went to bed.
It started truly invading everything I did. I'll give you an example. I was on my way home to pick up my son, and I was late.
I'm accountable for being late, and of course I get stopped at the red light. In the past, I would always swear, get aggravated, be detrimental, raise resistance, and then most likely attract more red lights on the way or other things to stop me.
I used gratitude all of a sudden and said, "Thank you. Thank you for giving me this opportunity. Obviously there's something in store for me that you're teaching me."
And this is the formula; lessons are miracles. Period. Lessons in life are the miracles of life. How do you learn lessons? Through experiences.
Those experiences can be seen as good or bad, but they truly are just experiences. So what makes an experience good or bad? Gratitude.
If something happens to you and you're grateful for it- like for me, I lost everything, as you stated earlier. Right?
When I truly believed and understood that I was so grateful that losing everything brought radical humility into my life, it was a great lesson, it was a miracle.
Without the miracle of radical humility, I wouldn't be where I am today. So in essence, the best thing that ever happened to me, most people would consider the hardest, most challenging, worst thing that ever happened to them, but it's the miracle of my life.
It's the miracle of humility, and one of the key components, one of the key characteristics to give me a better perspective along with gratitude.
Shawn Stevenson: I love that. I love it so much because as soon as you said it, it makes the past better, I was like, "What does this mean?" But it's so real.
But I think that you've also- it's a muscle that you exercise because, like you said-
David Meltzer: Innercise.
Shawn Stevenson: Innercise. When something seemingly negative on the surface is going on, for you to stop and then to realize like, "Wait a minute. This is happening for me. Right? It's not happening to me. It's a gift in there somewhere."
David Meltzer: Oh, let me touch on that one.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah, absolutely.
David Meltzer: Because I just went through this transformation, you'll love it. So I used to think everything happened to me, right? I remember when my brother died when I was in law school, and I almost had to drop out of law school, and I went home to my mom to tell her I was quitting law school, and my uncle said, "My biggest fear is you think everything happens to you. You're a victim. I've never seen you be a victim, Dave."
He's like, "Things don't happen to you, they happen for you. The universe is in your favor, it's always been in your favor." And so I lived the rest of my time thinking that.
My new philosophy, which I think is just incredible, is things don't even happen for me anymore, they happen through me.
So they're coming down for me, and then the only way they actually have value is when I give them away. X + David = more coming through me.
And that emptying of the vessel, keeping in the flow, allows me to attract and handle everything that I want. And how do we have things come through us? By doing good deeds; as many as we can.
And that living- so I tell people all the time, "Hold on. It's better than things are happening for you, man. They're happening through you. So not only happening for you, it's happening for everybody else, because we're all connected."
So it's all happening for and through us, and that gives me motivation. People say, "Why is money so important? You make a lot of money, help a lot of people, have a lot of fun."
Because everything comes through me. So the more money that I make, it's coming for everyone. Not only for me.
Shawn Stevenson: This is one of the greatest things I've ever heard.
David Meltzer: I've worked on it.
Shawn Stevenson: This is just blowing my mind right now. And I've never shared this before, this is just something that I carry in my mental construct, even before I did the show where if I'm going on stage, I always ask that- and I've never said these words out loud, "Spirit, speak through me, and goodness, speak through me. Service, come through me."
David Meltzer: Yeah.
Shawn Stevenson: And I've never heard anybody else articulate it, and it's just so refreshing to hear this because it's like it's a different level of being, and it's not just me in my little self that I have to do this job, it's something bigger, and I get to participate in it rather than-
David Meltzer: When you step on stage, you know it came through you because everyone else can tell you what you said, but you have no idea. Because it came right through you, right?
It didn't come from you, or to you, or for you. That's beautiful, man. It would help everybody if we all thought about the connectivity which is through emotions; energy and motion.
And the more energy that we have, the more it keeps flowing, and then people are like, "How do you do everything that you do?" It's just coming through me.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah. So let's shift gears and kind of get back to your story because losing everything and then having not just achieving- and by the way, I don't know if you've thought about this before, but when we talk about intention, and we talk about people being very clear on what it is that they want, but sometimes we have things that might be 'unrealistic,' and oftentimes that's just somebody else saying that.
But I've shared this many times because I've seen it enough times that if somebody's a certain- maybe they're 5'9" and they're trying to get to the NBA.
And maybe that might not happen, but you might end up in partnership with the NBA, right? And so your story, and hearing you knew that you were NFL-bound, and now one of your best friends on the planet is a Hall of Fame football player, Warren Moon, and the work that you do with the NFL, how nuts is that?
Have you ever thought about that?
David Meltzer: Yeah it gets-
Shawn Stevenson: You landed- it's like you shoot for the moon, you land amongst the stars.
David Meltzer: I landed on the moon, right? Warren Moon. Think about this. I went to law school to be a sports agent. As a back-up, I studied admiralty law. I went to Tulane University that studied both.
If somebody asked me, "How do you become a sports agent?" What if I told them, "Go to law school, don't practice law, sell legal research online, then work for a wireless proxy server in the Silicon Valley as a Director, then become CEO of a handheld device company, then retire. Start being a VC, and investor, and real estate guy, and own a golf course, a ski mountain.
Lose everything and then create a shift in the paradigm, a quantum shift in your life to provide value, and be of service, and manifest the CEO and Founder of the most notable sports agency in the world, Jerry Maguire, Leigh Steinberg, who will hire you in forty-eight hours from the time he met you."
That's how you become a sports agent. No, that's how life works though.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah, crazy.
David Meltzer: That's how crazy it is for me. And including my favorite Warren Moon story, is when I moved from Akron, Ohio to California, I was a huge Ohio State football fan.
In the Rose Bowl that year, 1978, Warren Moon was playing Michigan as a 16.5 point underdog in the Rose Bowl.
I asked my mom, and begged her if we could go to the Rose Bowl. With six kids, single mom, she packed us into the Country Squire station wagon, and I thought I was going to the Rose Bowl game.
No, we were going at 4:00 AM to sit on the curb of Colorado Boulevard to watch the parade. It was the most crushing thing for me. But Warren Moon was playing, and I remember on my way home listening to the game on the radio, because we couldn't afford to go to the game, and thinking to myself, "Although Ohio State is my favorite team, whoever plays Michigan is my second favorite."
And here was this unbelievable quarterback, Warren Moon, that beat Michigan, and MVP of the Rose Bowl. And someday, there I am forty years later, my best friend and business partner.
Shawn Stevenson: Nuts. That's amazing. Alright so I would love to talk about how, right? How did you- you're coming back, you've got this fresh perspective in building your company to be literally like the sports management company on the planet. So what are those kind of guiding principles?
How did you get from point A to this superstar status?
David Meltzer: It's so much fun because most people think it's complex, and I always say the universe loves simple.
Einstein talks about things being simple, I know you love that as well.
Shawn Stevenson: I've got to stop you because there's too many- this is one of my guiding principles. Einstein said, "If you can't explain it simply, then you don't know it well enough."
And that is like- when I heard that, it became my modus operandi. But go ahead.
David Meltzer: Yeah, and it became mine. And so when my wife told me to go back and take stock in who I was, I came up with four things.
Gratitude gave me perspective. Two, empathy, which was forgiveness, and there was only one person that I had to forgive: myself.
The third one was accountability. Simple question, what did I do to attract it to myself, and what am I supposed to learn from it? What miracle can come from it?
And then finally critically, the effective communication piece. How do I emotionally connect to everyone to make their lives better?
Emotionally connect, and also how do I emotionally connect to that which inspires me? Whatever you want to define that as.
I built a company- many people may not believe the simplicity of it, off of gratitude, empathy, accountability, and effective communication.
Everything that our company does is to create abundance. That means make a lot of money through us to help others, and to have fun because it's sports and entertainment, and surround ourselves with the right people.
But when interns come in, and new employees come in, and they have all these great aspirations of, "I'm going to teach him how to be a sports journalist, sports agent, sports marketer or publicist."
And I say, "Look, I'm only going to teach you four things." You should see their face. They think, "What do you mean?"
Those skills, you'll develop. I can give you access to all types of mentorship, all types of content, and information that will help you develop your skills and enhance your knowledge. That's not a problem. Right? That's not a problem.
Where we're going to succeed is all of us in a collective consciousness, all of us gathered together to provide value through gratitude, empathy, accountability, and effective communication, and that is the key.
No employee can live in our company without those four key principles, and if you ask anyone when you come visit us, Shawn, ask them, "What are the four things that you learn here? What are the four things you do here?" They'll all tell you the exact same thing.
Shawn Stevenson: Let me ask them. What's the four things you guys learn?
Male: Gratitude, empathy, accountability, and effective communication.
Shawn Stevenson: Damn! Like that, right there. Tattooed.
David Meltzer: It's in every meeting, every Monday morning meeting, every Friday, anyone that comes in. Because I know, and it frustrates me because it's so simple.
I'll tell you another one that has changed my business, and it's simple, but I know it's going to change your life. Be a student of your calendar.
Now I know that sounds simple, but people don't study their calendar. So the time and you are the two things that get in your way.
And when I say study the calendar, that means look at everything you do in-person, on the phone, via email, or social media. Well, look at that calendar.
Look in the deep past what actually is happening, because if you just look at your calendar, you'll forget 90% of it immediately. Let alone the rest of the day, there's no way you know what you're doing at 12:15.
But when you study your calendar and you say, "Who else can I help? Who else can help me? What value can I bring?"
But not only do I look at what I'm doing as a student of my calendar, I look through an eye of productivity and accessibility. How productive am I going to be? But also, how accessible I am to others, as well as what am I going to access out of this?
But more importantly, I look at the white space in my calendar, the empty part, I study it. People don't realize that's the most important part.
Being productive and accessible when you don't have people, emails, texts, or social media things to do. That white space is where it all happens. That's where you develop your relationships with your parents, and your kids, and your friends. That's where you exercise.
And I started filling up my white space, "This is where I'm going to call my mom for one minute to tell her I love and appreciate her."
Changed my whole relationship with my mom because I call her every single day, text her, email her, and let her know I love and appreciate her.
My relationship changed. I don't have to prove to her I love and appreciate her. So she's not calling me saying, "Hey, can you get this for me? Or can you drive down?"
She never does that because she knows- that's the only reason parents ask you those things. They can do it themselves, but they want you to show them you love and appreciate them.
So if people are out there asking you to do stuff that you know they can do themselves, it's because you're not showing them or giving them what they need.
And when you look at things through that accessibility, 'how can I be of service,' then find out what people need. Whether you know them or not.
I ask people all the time on the street, "How can I be of service?" You should see their face.
Some people say, "Can you give me a dollar?" Some people, "Can you buy me lunch?" Some people say, "Nothing really." Or, "Hey I work for this charity," and the whole world gets better.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah, what a concept.
David Meltzer: Yeah.
Shawn Stevenson: So simple. So simple, but it's another guiding light, and to see that an organization is built on that is just really refreshing. And there's a service component, there's a charitable component to everything that you get involved with now. Is that right?
David Meltzer: My whole life. So I wake up every morning and before I do my gratitude prayer, I pray for ten people that God will put in front of me that I can help.
First prayer, may ten people come in to me that I can help, and everything that I do has to have a purpose or a cause tied to it.
So everybody that we do business with, we have to understand the 'why.' Why are we doing this? Because it's can't just be for money because money is coming through me.
What are we going to do with what we produce? How accessible are we going to be with the duality of it?
And I think is seems cliché a lot of times, and I wrote a book called 'Compassionate Capitalism,' that talks about the merchant priests, and how they would do it for the service of it but it'd make money.
And I am a compassionate- I think making money is a good thing. Here's where it changed for me as I got older.
I used to always think that I had to look at what was I doing with my money that determined how good the money was. Right?
So I always kind of had that side of it. "Okay, as long as I'm making a lot of money, but I'm helping the Big Brothers Big Sisters, and the Boys and Girls Club, and St. Jude, and Crescent Moon." Right?
But it was much bigger than that, and most people don't think about it. I actually think about how am I making my money and where is it going?
And I think you have to extend and challenge yourself to say, "How am I attracting abundance? Am I helping people by attracting abundance? Am I empowering people by-" and really challenging yourself to be compassionate in the way that you attract your abundance and what you do with it.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah, I think that congruency accelerates that abundance as well.
David Meltzer: Absolutely.
Shawn Stevenson: Because I literally know some folks who are like- they're a health coach, but then they're working for a pharmaceutical company just to make ends meet. You know?
And they're just like, "I don't want to do this."
David Meltzer: It's soul sucking.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah, and that honesty is important. You know? And then the action has to come along with that, because I think you're a big person on the action side as well, because it's not just thinking about it and, "I'm going to manifest something with my mind."
But you need to put your feet in action.
David Meltzer: Yeah, I learned a great law. I've always believed in the Law of Attraction, the laws of the universe, the Eight Golden Laws.
But John Assaraf and I- who wrote 'Innercise,' he blew me away when he said, "David, you're more of a Law of GOYA guy than I see the Law of the Universe."
I'm like, "What's the Law of GOYA?" And he goes, "Get Off Your Butt." Right? The law of that, and yeah, I'm an action guy.
What good is all your ideas, what good is doing well, if you're not taking action? Go back to Einstein. What does he say? The first step is to take action.
Shawn Stevenson: Very first step.
David Meltzer: Very first step. Nothing happens until it moves.
Shawn Stevenson: Exactly. Exactly, it's just potential energy until you put it in motion. And man, that's so fascinating. You know, there's a component to- and I mentioned this to you before the show started, but Thrive Market.
Every organization that I'm involved with has a charitable component. They're not just looking at this little small window of, "How can I make money?" But, "How can I serve at a bigger level?"
And so I think you're going to love this, but Thrive Market, what they're doing right now, because one of the biggest barriers of entry for getting healthy food. People- "I want to eat healthier, but the expense."
David Meltzer: Yeah.
Shawn Stevenson: And depending on what level you're at, it can be definitely expensive, you know? It costs more for a lot of companies to do things the right way.
And so what they decided to do was to eliminate that as an issue, and to curate food products, personal care items, household products without all these crazy chemicals, but doing this in a way that they're working directly with the companies- the very best companies, and so it's going to be direct-to-consumer.
And so what they are doing now is offering- and they've been around for a couple years now. At first when I found out about them, I was like, "How are you guys even making money?" Because I was saving so much.
And I love Whole Foods, I think they're great and they provide- it's like changed culture. But you know, the nickname is like Whole Paycheck.
So many of the same products, they have them available for most items 25% to 50% off what you find at Whole Foods.
So the toothpaste that I was using, the coconut oil I was buying, the chia seeds, all these things 25% to 50% less.
And so also, by the way, for listeners' first time when you take advantage of this, and go over to www.ThriveMarket.com/modelhealth, you get an additional 25% off your entire first purchase, and you get free shipping.
Now here's the other part, listen to this. Every new member- and by the way, you want to keep the membership, because it's just going to keep paying you back.
They give away a free membership to somebody in need. This can be a veteran, this can be a teacher, this can be a low-income household, and they're going to pay that- not even pay it forward, they're just going to give.
Right? So every time when you invest, you're helping somebody else, and helping your own family and your own well-being.
So head over, check them out. It's www.ThriveMarket.com/modelhealth together as one word, 'modelhealth,' and again 25% to 50% off all these products already, an additional 25% off your first purchase, and free shipping.
Because free shipping can get me, you know? Like I'll spend $300 on some clothes and shoes or whatever for my kid, and it's like $20 shipping, and I was like, "I'll just go to the store." You know?
It's so silly, but that might be a barrier of entry, so free shipping as well, alright? Head over, check them out, www.ThriveMarket.com/modelhealth.
David Meltzer: Free shipping for me, like one thing that drives me crazy- and that's why I give my book to anyone that asks.
So I don't give a free book and charge you for shipping, I pay for the shipping. Right? I'll fly coach on Southwest instead of flying private so I can pay for shipping for the month for the thousand people that request books from me.
Because Thrive, it literally is a thriving idea. I built a sales system; Five to Thrive. Stimulate interest, transition interest, share a vision, manage and develop a vision, then thrive.
The idea of thrive is my personal mission; empower others to empower others.
When you create two pieces of energy, they create more energy, and that pay it forward- not pay it forward, it's thriving. And if people believe in really being of service and helping others, everything will thrive.
It just goes through us, and then through others, and so I think it's really important. I know Thrive is a great company, but the concept in living true to what their name is, is essential, which is indicative of someone giving you free shipping.
So come get my book, I'll send it to you for free.
Shawn Stevenson: Oh man, I love it.
David Meltzer: You can thrive with it.
Shawn Stevenson: So there are so many things I want to ask you about, but you talked earlier about being around the right people, the right ideas, nut not just being around the right people, but being the right person yourself.
And there was something I heard you talk about that really struck a chord with me, the 99%-ers. And it's very similar to something I've been talking about, but just kind of talking about with my wife for a while. So can you talk about what that is?
David Meltzer: Yeah, so there's potential which is 100% and people feel- it's kind of like the Zeroing Effect, right?
"I've done everything that I can," and 99% doesn't get you there. It's the empty mile, right? I don't even call it the extra mile, like they say the extra mile is lonely. I think the extra mile, the last 1% is truly empty, and that when we do something, it has to be consistent every day, persistent without quit, and enjoyment of the pursuit of that 100%, and that we hold ourselves to 100% standard. Not the 99%.
Because it is- I've had great employees. I used to tell them all the time, "You know what? I wish you intentionally did this, because then I could fire you. But you're just being a 99%-er."
Right? And so if you live 100% in gratitude, and empathy, accountability, and effective communication, you will get this exponential result. The one times two times three all the way up to as many days as you can do it.
And then when it starts firing, it's exponential. It's exponential. Giving would be a good example.
When I first made my first real paycheck- I wasn't bankrupt when I went to start to work for Leigh, the snowball kind of effect happened while I was working with Leigh.
And so I lost my money, and so the hardest thing I had to do was go ahead and tell my mom that, "I know my dream was to buy you a house and a car, but I just lost your house, and you need to move out."
And then walk into my dream job, being CEO of Leigh Steinberg, the Jerry Maguire movie, going in to Leigh and saying, "Hey, you know the great and powerful CEO that has the Midas touch that owned the golf course, the ski mountain, and the guy you brag about how successful I am? I lost everything."
Right? That there- 99%-er until I took 100% accountability. Right? It's a different thing. It takes your whole being, and so many people cheat themselves because they do work hard, but they waste it by not completing it. They're not giving everything they have.
Shawn Stevenson: For me, it makes no sense, but I can- let me take a step back. I can understand it, because I've been there, but for me- a great example, we were renovating our old house to put it on the market, and this house has just been just a headache.
Everything- a money pit for real. Like a real life money pit.
David Meltzer: I've been there.
Shawn Stevenson: And we had a guy came on board, like a friend of a friend type of thing, and he does great work. And he did so much work, he put in a lot of hours, going to the Home Depot and spending there, and doing everything. The house looks really beautiful.
There are all these small things, just like ten tiny things that might take him two hours to finish, and he just ghosted. Right?
I started like- and I'm not the kind of guy that's going to run after anybody.
David Meltzer: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Shawn Stevenson: But after like the third call, I'm just like, "Man, he's a 99%-er." Literally I had this conversation with my wife. Like, "Why don't people just go finish? There's 1% left."
And then I heard you talk about the 99%-ers. I was like, "I love this man." You know? But this happens so consistently, you know?
Somebody reached out and my wife got these incredible products for her hair. She has natural hair, and it can be complicated in her universe, you know?
And she loved the products more than anything that she's had, and so she was trying to connect the person with somebody else, but just that follow-up, not really being there.
It's just like you did all this work to get to this, now we're going to possibly blow you up, you've got to be right there and be ready, you know? Follow through on that 1%.
David Meltzer: Yeah. Think about grass. This is one of my favorite analogies, right? So grass grows from down in the soft, moist dirt. It's easy, right?
As it gets closer to breaking through, that thermostat, that last 1% is hard. And you've got a flimsy piece of grass, but if you push through the last 1%.
Shawn Stevenson: Boom.
David Meltzer: It grows, right? Bamboo will grow- it takes five years to get, and then in one month it grows like forty feet or whatever.
That's what the last 1% is with. That's what the empty mile is for, and that's where the enjoyment- to me, the enjoyment is that difficulty of breaking through.
And part of the reason we have difficulty, when you say you don't know why people do it, it's because it's unconscious. Right?
There's a duality in the unconscious. One is energetically. We keep attracting the same shortages, voids, obstacles, and limitations.
Energetically, we have a thermostat, and Ed and I discussed that, right? Breaking through, so you've got to shift your energy.
But the other side that I've been studying, which is interesting that you'll understand from being health-oriented and understanding as a student, is there is a genetic disposition, there's a DNA that you carry that's been handed down from four generations down to you that you have a disposition.
Personalities, traits, characteristics, even addictions and obsessions that have been carried down that are programmed. And there is an exogenous layer that can activate and deactivate, including your health.
And I know you are one of the people that, to me, have proven that understanding how to deactivate certain things within your bone by looking and being more interested than interesting, and what you did was simply number one, you shifted your energy for your health, but two, you just deactivated the DNA.
That's the way the human computer works, that code. And so why people can't do the extra 1%, sometimes it's just an unconscious competency that they believe is their reality.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah. Yeah, but the great news is that it's changeable.
David Meltzer: Yeah, right it's changeable.
Shawn Stevenson: Wow, that's so great, man. So great. I love that analogy with the grass. That is so powerful and so true.
So another big thing that I picked up from following you, and it's just been a fascinating thing for me recently, and I've been talking about this, is learning from other people, not just yourself. You know?
Learning from other people's mistakes because it's not just success leaves clues, alright? Failure leaves some huge, huge clues as well.
So you talk about this concept of a Dummy Tax. Can you talk about that?
David Meltzer: Yeah, first of all, I give a Dummy Tax award. A Dummy Tax is what you pay from the lessons that you learn, right? That's the tax you pay.
And so I use this analogy in my company, I want to encourage people to make mistakes, so I give a Dummy Tax award that basically we go around the room at least once a month and say, "What mistake did you make? Did it break gratitude? Empathy? Accountability?"
These are the 'whys.' You can narrow it to all four. "And what effect did it have and what did you learn?" And so then I pick out who paid the most Dummy Tax, and I pay him back with cash.
Shawn Stevenson: Wow.
David Meltzer: Here's my analogy of the Dummy Tax. We try to do everything ourselves, right? Why? It doesn't make any sense.
I'm 5'7". If I have to reach something ten feet up, I can go get it, right? I can figure it out, I can build this stuff up, and climb on your desk. I run risks.
I could fall, I can slip. Right? It takes way more time. But how easy it'd be to walk over to that guy over there that's 6'7" and say, "Hey, can you reach that for me?"
Shawn Stevenson: Right.
David Meltzer: That's how life works. Why is it we want to take all the time and pay the Dummy Tax ourselves, when simply first of all, there's no bigger compliment or way to make someone feel good about themselves than say, "Hey man, you're an expert at this. Can you help me? I know you know everything- you have the situational knowledge."
Every time someone says, "Dave, can you help me with this?" It makes me feel so good, and then I make them feel good, and they don't have to go lose over $100 million in real estate.
They can ask me- I'll tell you this. I owned a golf course, $12 million to build, all in, won over $120 million. If I would have picked up the Yellow Pages at the time - if people don't know what that is, there was a book that had all the numbers in it - and just picked out any golf course owner and said, "Hey man, what am I supposed to do?"
Not one of those guys would have said, "Leverage the shit out of it." This was 2008. "Why don't you leverage it for everything you have?"
Right? Every golf course guy would have told me the same advice, because I got it later. "Oh dude, you need to be the third owner of a golf course. That's the guy that makes money."
Not the first owner, and if you're the first owner and you've got a golf course that's worth money, sell it. Think about how much I would have saved myself.
So my first step is to ask for help, and then what do I do? Offer help, right? First step is all accessibility.
"Can I be of service?" Or, "Can I ask you for a favor? I heard you're really good at old Aston cars. I want to buy one for my wife. Can you help me get one?"
Do you know how much Dummy Tax when I've got an expert helping me?
Shawn Stevenson: It's not just you're telling them what to do, but what not to do, which can be far more valuable.
David Meltzer: Of course. Of course. You should have three mentors at all time in your life that sit in the situation that you want to be in.
It can be in relationship to money, it can be as happily married. Whatever you want, have that mentor, learn from it, and move on.
Shawn Stevenson: Absolutely. So another thing is recently you had a big revelation about your health.
David Meltzer: Yes.
Shawn Stevenson: And you kind of shifted gears and put massive action towards getting yourself in the best shape.
David Meltzer: Yeah.
Shawn Stevenson: So can you talk about- and I love this quote that you said at the end of one of your videos- and make sure to follow him on Instagram, it's incredible.
"I spend more on my health than people spend on a Ferrari." So what sparked this intention for you to start really focusing on you?
David Meltzer: So I started seeing myself because of all the speaking, and social media, and all of that. When you start looking at yourself, because our own self-opinion- you know, age is a funny thing.
You can never describe it to someone, and you always feel better than you really are. If you have a positive attitude, it can work against you.
I started seeing myself on stage and going, "Man, I'm not in good shape." In my head somehow I thought I was that guy playing football, right?
And so I started talking to people about habits, and I started becoming a hypocrite. I'm like, "Wait a second. I'm teaching people about habits, I'm not healthy."
So my initial reaction was I'm going to diet, right? And then I started realizing, "No, there's something wrong." And then I was approached by a guy from Stark, which is a full 360 type of nutrition, and stretching, everything.
And he said to me, "Look, you need to make your health a priority because I want you to be around. I want you to be around."
And I'm like, "Wait a second. My health is my third priority. I put my family first, my work second, and my health was third." And I was losing out. Both diet, exercise, stretching, I didn't even know how bad I was.
And so I went ahead, and I changed around my priorities, and I made my health my first priority. It was going to be my greatest expense because if I'm not here, nothing can come through me.
And so I literally changed my life. I lost forty-seven pounds of fat, I've gained eleven pounds of muscle. Cardiovascular I am beyond, flexibility, balance. Everything that I do for health is something I can do for life.
And so I just simply- like I do for any habit, I set a minimum amount of time that I'm going to spend on my health.
So a minimum every single day consistently, one hour minimum on my health, focusing on my health. You know? Cardio, whatever it is, I'm focused on my health. A minimum of- and at whatever cost, it comes first.
I leave work- I never did this. I leave work to go work out. Right? I leave work because it's more important than work.
And you know, so many times people tell me- I heard Tony Robbins today, he was on Paul Rabil. I love this line.
He goes, "If you don't have ten minutes for something, you don't have a life." But how many people tell me, "I don't got time."
Shawn Stevenson: Right.
David Meltzer: I'm telling you, if you don't have an hour for your health, you don't have a life. If you are not focused 1/24 of your day on being here for as long as you can, and enjoying it by being healthy, you don't have a life, just figure something else out.
So you should be spending as much money as you can, as much time as you can, focus as you can on yourself so things can go through you and help more. It's awesome.
Shawn Stevenson: Wow, that's incredible. And the crazy thing is that it makes everything bigger. You know? Your business exponentially better, your family.
David Meltzer: Your sleep.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah, everything. Everything. And seeing so many people- because one of the things we get into psychologically is with family first, we want to make sure that we're a good person and we're standing up for our family.
Moms have a bigger issue with this, tends to be. I've worked with thousands of people in a one-on-one context in my clinic, and it's very altruistic seemingly on the surface.
David Meltzer: Martyrs.
Shawn Stevenson: Right, I'm sacrificing for you, right?
David Meltzer: Yeah, that was my thing.
Shawn Stevenson: But at the end of the day, your kids don't want you, they want the best you. Right? They don't want the beaten down, tired, oftentimes resentful.
David Meltzer: Dead.
Shawn Stevenson: Exactly, you know? Let's take care of you first, you are the number one priority so that you can show up as your best self for them. Everything gets better, but we need to start giving moms permissions, we need to start giving dads permission, start giving ourselves permission.
David Meltzer: Bosses permission to leave, right?
Shawn Stevenson: Yes, it's a cultural shift.
David Meltzer: And employees permission to go be healthy. And I think it's true. Have you ever heard of the Karpman Drama Triangle?
Shawn Stevenson: No.
David Meltzer: Karpman, something that I just discovered, and it has a triangle-
Shawn Stevenson: I thought you was talking about Cartman.
David Meltzer: Yeah, like from South Park. I wish. But this Drama Triangle, it includes the rescuer. And my biggest core energy, emotional energy that I had to shift is that I was a rescuer.
Born into a family where I had to rescue my mom, but rescuers are victims. Rescuers are victims.
And it's a really important lesson to think about. It's that mom, she's a rescuer, but she's made herself a victim, right?
If she's sick, or dies, or doesn't have enough- all the things that martyr sacrifices that she's made, she's a rescuer, but she's made herself a victim.
And so I really want to encourage people to look at that, and look at that triangle, and say, "Look, I'm not a victim," and it shows all three parties of being a victim.
Shawn Stevenson: That's powerful. That's powerful, I never heard of that before.
David Meltzer: It's good stuff.
Shawn Stevenson: Yeah. So speaking of health overall, emotional mental health, why do you think service is good for our mental and emotional health?
David Meltzer: Oh, anything that makes us feel good, that's positive- it's the reason you listen to certain things, surround yourself with the right people or idea, there's no better truth than love and giving.
The truth vibrates the fastest, right? Of all thoughts, the truth vibrates the fastest, so giving vibrates the fastest. It's the truth, and it's going to make you feel good.
My favorite thing about giving is simply mathematically. There's very few things that you can do. If I give, biochemicals are released in my brain, serotonin as you know, so it makes me feel good.
It's good for everything, right? Giving you something makes you feel good. But here's the most powerful thing in Einstein's sense.
My favorite part of giving, not only do you and I feel better when I give and I'm of service, but anyone that witnesses it, whether they witness it in person, or when it's captured and perpetuated on the Internet, or on TV when you're watching, or on a movie.
When you see that giving of service, we tear up, we feel good, right? Think about it. That's the best thing ever. That's why it vibrates the fastest. What else can have that effect other than giving? Just witnessing it.
That's what's awesome about giving.
Shawn Stevenson: Wow, I love it, man. So, so powerful. I've got 1,000 other things I want to talk to you about, and luckily I have you now in my circle, in my life.
David Meltzer: Yes, anytime.
Shawn Stevenson: So man, this has just been awesome. And I would love if you let folks know where they can connect with you, let them know about your show, which is the coolest. Really quickly, can you just share some of the cool incredible folks that you've had on your show?
David Meltzer: Yeah, so I try to pick people with- it's called The Playbook. And so I've had Danica Patrick, Ray Lewis, Warren Moon of course, Apolo Ohno, we've had Gary V, you're coming on, Ed Mylett, Bob Proctor.
It just goes on and on. I look for people that have situational knowledge that sit in the position that other people want to get into.
And when I talked to Danica Patrick, I don't talk about car racing, right? She talks about things like, "Hey, I'm not racing. Like this is what I learned from it. This is what I love."
Ray Lewis telling you about the eagle or the lion. I especially loved Ray Lewis' episode. And then finally, Sugar Ray Leonard, right? We talked about physical abuse, and he actually encouraged me to come out and admit my own experience with being abused, you know?
Which I never had- I believe in illumination, but there's all these layers of things that I'm still afraid to tell people. And so I think and hope it encourages and inspires other people to live as close to their potential and enjoy it, and that's The Playbook.
And then of course I've got a TV show called Elevator Pitch to help entrepreneurs with Entrepreneur Magazine. So check out that.
I'm @DavidMeltzer on Instagram, but the easiest way too if you're not into following me on Instagram @DavidMeltzer, just Google me. I'm blessed to be that David Meltzer.
You can find my websites, and Facebook, and everything. I don't hide, and if you DM me and want my cellphone, I'll give it to you. I answer everything myself.
Shawn Stevenson: Incredible. Incredible. You're a superhero, you're an absolute superhero, and I'm just so blown away by your story, and so blown away by the fact of you continuing to have the heart to keep looking forward despite all of the different circumstances that came up along the way, and the transformation.
You're like not even a 'twice-borner.' You're like a third, four, fifth-borner.
David Meltzer: I'm a cockroach, my friend. Nothing's going to get me.
Shawn Stevenson: And so I'm just really grateful to see you, and to see your journey, and to see now you're sharing it with so many people, and it's just so beautiful to have access to that. So thank you for that.
David Meltzer: Thank you, Shawn.
Shawn Stevenson: Final question. What is the model that you're here to set for other people with how you live your life personally?
David Meltzer: It's radical humility, you know? I think time and ego are what creates resistance in our life, and the only thing that can overcome time and ego is humility, and that humility of illuminating who we are, being grateful for who we are, it all stems from being humble.
You can't ask for help unless you're humble. You can't be of service unless you're humble. You can't be grateful unless you're humble.
So the model is to be humble and be willing to expose and live as close to the truth consistently, persistently, and enjoy it every day, your potential.
Shawn Stevenson: David Meltzer, thank you.
David Meltzer: Awesome. Thanks, Shawn.
Shawn Stevenson: Everybody, thank you so much for tuning into the show today. I hope you got a lot of value out of this. There are so many huge take-aways, and my wheels are spinning. I don't know about you.
And I just feel like taking action and changing my perception. This is another thing that he talks about because our perception is our reality, and what if we started to live in our reality more grateful?
What if we started to live more focused on finishing and not being a 99%-er? Alright? I know some people are like, "Well, I'm like at 76%."
What if we start to follow through? What if we really focus on giving as not just a means of helping another person, but understanding like in the bigger picture, this is not just helping them, this is also helping us and the change in the chemical cascade that has the effects on our bodies, but also the people around us that witness that giving.
And stop holding back on that, you know? Really listening to our heart, really see the people in need. Sometimes we don't pay attention because we don't want to.
We don't want to see suffering, we don't want to see that other people might not be in a position that you're in, and this is all the more reason to really open ourselves up and have that empathy.
It's another quality that they're right on the money, his whole team, in talking about.
And so all of these things together I really think create a really perfected human being, and I know Dave would probably argue against him being that, but I think that he's one of the prototypes for sure.
So thank you so much for tuning into the show today. I hope you got a lot of value out of this, and if you did, make sure to share this out with your friends and family on social media, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, all that good stuff.
Tag me, tag David, let him know what you thought about the episode, alright? I appreciate you so much.
We've got some incredible episodes coming soon, so take care, have an amazing day, and I'll talk with you soon.
And for more after the show, make sure to head over to www.TheModelHealthShow.com. That's where you can find all of the show notes, you can find transcriptions, videos for each episode, and if you've got a comment you can leave me a comment there as well.
And please make sure to head over to iTunes and leave us a rating to let everybody know that the show is awesome, and I appreciate that so much.
And take care, I promise to keep giving you more powerful, empowering, great content to help you transform your life. Thanks for tuning in.
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